I’m not so sure I want to call myself a photographer anymore.
I love photography more than anything – I work hard at it, it brings me immense joy, and I am always learning from experience. I have been “shooting” for well over 10 years now, and began with black and white film which I developed and printed myself. I moved on to slide film after that, and know my way comfortably around an old-school, fully-manual SLR. Now that I have taken on digital, my skills continue to expand as the technology allows me more instant-feedback.
I have come to believe that photography is an equal-opportunity art. Learning the basic skills and pressing the shutter-release is something anyone can do, and the best way to improve one’s eye is to look at the work of others, and to keep practicing. The present range of styles and techniques is astounding, and in the era of the digital darkroom, the boundaries will continue to be pushed.
More and more often though, I am meeting “photographers” who have egos to match their hefty lenses and over-stuffed gear bags. When I see their cameras, make a comment or some small-talk, and express my own interest in photography, I am repeatedly running into a particularly cruel response. Because I don’t have a camera around my neck at that moment? Because I don’t look the part - I’m a young quirky woman? I’m starting to think that it is because I don’t have a stick up my ass.
Today at lunch I happened to share a table with a group of “photographers” here for a seminar. The first few to ask if they could join me were polite enough, but uninterested in chit chat. The guy who sat down right next to me, however, turned out to be a complete jerk. He set his equipment on the ground, and when I said that I had been admiring all of the nice gear the seminar attendees had, he said “Well, you should really be admiring the talent you are in the presence of.” Oooookay – I’d love to, but I’d never seen their work and they weren’t exactly carrying around galleries along with their top-of-the-line whiz-bang cameras. Still, I was willing to respect that they were there to work hard at their craft. That is, until he said “We’re going to talk about technical things you won’t understand now” and turned his attention to the others at the table. I was floored. I wasn’t aware that being a condescending ass made someone a better photographer, but it seems to be a pretty common approach.
I resisted kicking his camera as I left the table. Being tired and stressed, I was on the verge of tears – if people like him are the norm in the world of photography, I want none of it. I want to do my own thing and refer to myself as some other creative type. I have been brushed-off, condescended to, ignored, and outright insulted by too many people who call themselves “photographers” – they may have enjoyed some success with their work, and they are often very good at what they do, but somewhere along the way they seem to have lost sight of just how beautifully egalitarian photography can be. It is almost as pure an art form as there can be - the opportunity to see the world through someone else’s eyes should be treasured, not trampled.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, my camera and I have things to do, places to see, people to meet…
